Cheesy Michelle

Why is everyone so angry about straws? You all acting like we made you put down your dog. Nobody said it’d solve all issues. Besides, wasn’t it about marine life and not carbon?

Hopium tolerances are up across the board. News is having to adjust our dosages accordingly

DNC has already shown they aren’t taking that as the lesson learnt. They won’t even release the 2024 autopsy cause they don’t like what it says

Note to men: a loud car/motorcycle is not the human equivalent of this. We want literal gular-pumping and buccal pulsing.

I would prefer our monetary systems come with the flexibility that is present when managed by governments. Unless someone can create crypto that has consumer protections

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Crypto does work because digital scarcity is not good enough to create meaningful value so the fall back value is the energy input into the token. And the idea something is valuable just because of the electricity used is not very compelling and will never be adopted. Bitcoins price right now is highly based on miners keeping a floor based on not wanting a loss on their current energy input. Crypto basically abstracts the concept of money so far that losing actual reasons why it works. Touch grass

I like the new punchline better

It’s cause crayons that come in 24 packs taste better than the 12 packs

If it were profitable to burn down a warehouse, there’d be a whole industry around it

You jest but “wait and retry” is such a powerful tool in my DevOps toolbox. First thing I tell junior engineers when they run across anything weird

Is there anything actually illegal happening here?

Sometimes I’m just doing stuff for chaos’s sake. Ill buy the game just to cause trouble. I guess we just find entertainment value in different things, cause I have a great time with this kind of drama

JOE is over in hospice care

Why don’t the headlines include that this was his response to asking if Obama was right when he said aliens exist? It makes it so much funnier

No handlers? We all already forgot about Dick?

“Government Sanctioned Radio” “Rally round the family with a pocket full of shell. But unironically”

Grass always appears greener on the other side. He made the right choice, but will forever try to figure out if there was a wish that could have gotten him true love and a spaceship

Freak shit it is. Thanks for the advice!