“Full Stack Dev” AKA Backend Dev who knows just enough about CSS to be dangerous.

Most organizations in the US don’t value cybersecurity as anything more than an abstract concept. The reasons for that can be numerous but in my experience it’s usually a combination of cost + survivorship bias.

Lack of serious consequences is another factor. Had a breach? Pay a small fine and an even smaller settlement (or should I say your insurance pays) and then it’s back to business as usual. Even in situations where the breach is due to gross negligence, the consequences are minimal (see Equifax).

Real talk: I wish more orgs place a high value on QA. A good QA team is worth it’s weight in gold and helps prevent a lot of stupid mistakes.

No good deed goes unpunished.

One time I worked on a team that had a ridiculously high defect rate. Stuff was constantly getting kicked back from QA. Management kept piling on all kinds of convoluted processes to try to reduce the number of defects which only made things worse.

I started really hammering the need for doing a root cause analysis as part of bug/defect tickets. Don’t just fix the bug. Make sure you understand what caused it and link the bug ticket to the ticket that caused it.

Big surprise (not really), 90% of the bugs and defects were being caused by like 3 people.

Your comment made me think of some of the PM’s whining about adding one story point for doing an RCA because apparently it’s better to just ignore the problem and keep pumping out shitty broken code as fast as possible.

Notice of Executive Order Violation

This post is in violation of Presidential Executive Order # 14168. It contains the following prohibited terms: “trans”, and will be scheduled for deletion immediately by order of the Department Of Government Efficiency.

Just a matter of time before someone reintroduces smallpox to humans.

Well there’s a thought I did not need in my brain today.

Why are they spending billions on this?

Greed.

This reminds me of a buddy I used to have. He wore jackets exactly like this and even had two little dogs. He was a Vietnam vet and did, in fact, kill a whole bunch of people during the war. Something he never forgave himself for.

One time I asked him what that was like. He thought for a minute and said, “When you have your weapon trained on someone, for a split second you have the power of God in your hands. You get to decide if that person lives or dies. Nobody should have that kind of power.”

He was a character but a good dude overall.

There’s usually a trail leading back. Grease and fats solidify very quickly in a cold sewer line.

Remember when the Governor of Missouri tried to have a guy arrested for notifying the state of Missouri that they had a breach in one of the state websites, making peoples PII publicly visible?

That’s the kind of idiots you’re dealing with here. “We added you to a group chat by mistake and it’s all YOUR fault.”

Yes. Because they’ll store everything in MongoDB.

Kirby model 513 from 1953. Still works great after 72 years.

Me: “The Vacuum is not going to hurt you. Calm down.”

The vacuum:

PO: “Why does it seem like it takes a really long time to develop new features?”

Dev: “I’m glad you asked! We’ve got this piece of code (points at smoldering pile of spaghetti) that literally has to be changed every time we do anything. The person who wrote it has been gone for like four years. No one knows how it works and it’s central to the entire application. I would estimate that this easily doubles the time it takes to work each ticket. I’ve created a set of stories to rewrite this code. We just need your approval to bring it into an upcoming sprint.”

PO: “Can’t… Hear… Breaking… Up… Bad connection…”

Dev: “Uhhh… This isn’t a Teams meeting. You’re sitting in the room with us right now.”

PO: …

Dev: “We know you’re still here even if you’re not moving.”

PO: …

The US is currently shooting itself in the face and Russia is embroiled in a war that it can’t actually win.

All China has to do to reap the benefits is not interrupt.

0/10. Do not recommend.

One time I came home from work and found a deer in my front yard that had been hit by a car. It was still standing but it looked awful. I seriously thought about putting it out of its misery but before I could do anything, it limped off into the woods right behind my house where it collapsed and died.

About three days later, I opened my front door and got hit in the face by the most horrible smell I have ever smelt. Imagine the smell from when you leave a meat package in the trash for a day or two. Dial that up to about 1000. Set it in the hot sun for three days and you’ll probably be pretty close. It’s so strong it stimulates your gag reflex. I have a pretty strong stomach but I thought I was going to be sick. I couldn’t go outside for a week after that because that’s how long it took the scavengers to clean up the carcass.

Delete this now.