I was just thinking about that while watching youtube last night. “This recipe is so easy I make it every day!” No you don’t, you fucking liar. I can’t make your recipe now because it’ll taste like lies.

You generously teach a man to fish against his will, and what kind of thanks do you get?

It’s been decades and this guy is still finding fresh new ways to use that template. I’m mildly amazed.

You know the answer to that.

I say that when I’m about to ask a question that sounds disingenuous but I honestly feel like everyone but me got the memo about it.

I think also Manbat?

To be fair, the only one of my friends with a PHD is also the most supervillain-y.

You had bigger things on your mind. Origin of the cosmos, ultimate destiny of mankind, stuff like that.

Could that be because it’s a French word and they pluralise differently?

I live in a right-side drive country.

The first time I ever heard of a Zamboni was when Ryan Renolds drove one over a guy in the first Deadpool movie.

Who’s the other guy?

Yeah, it was the moneychangers and the stall keepers that tolerated them.

It was a religious duty to contribute money for the upkeep of the temple. So people would come from out of town and try to hand over their cash and the priests would say “we can’t accept foreign coinage… go talk to that dude over there with the heavy pockets, he’ll help you”. And the moneychanger would convert their currency, but not without keeping a fat percentage for himself.

The lesson (as I read it) is that setting yourself up as a gatekeeper and forcing people to pay you in order to do the right thing is an especially odious behaviour, even if it’s legal.

Look closer at the third panel.

Is exaggeration for humour something you’re unaware of?

I’d quite like to see Michael Fassbender in the role.

I didn’t really enjoy Prometheus, but it showed us he can do subtly creepy.

His career may survive this. But his fellow pilots and crew will never

ever

ever

forget this.

Were you in Miss Phipps’ class with Abaddon The Bringer Of Anguish too?

Could be climate change, could be normal weather cycles. My country tends to get five wet years followed by five dry years.

Enjoying your own awkward company. In that situation I can’t make eye contact with myself.

How so?

Hold on, I want to hear the other toppings first.