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TrackShovel@lemmy.today to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 15 hours ago

Pet the things

lemmy.today

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Pet the things

lemmy.today

TrackShovel@lemmy.today to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 15 hours ago
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  • Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de
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    9 hours ago

    And then we pour them into engines to make em go.

    • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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      5 hours ago

      Pet all the unicellular plankton!

      • dudinax@programming.dev
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        4 hours ago

        It’s all about size and appearance. Who’s petting the ten-foot long centipedes?

        • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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          3 hours ago

          But they don’t go into our engines.

        • KokoSabreScruffy@lemmy.world
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          4 hours ago

          Count me in.

        • biggerbogboy@sh.itjust.works
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          3 hours ago

          Awwwww

    • UltraBlack@lemmy.world
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      5 hours ago

      At least we have our replicas

  • lookingforanALFpolycule@lemmy.world
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    12 hours ago

    Sorry but we are literally killing 90 billion of their descendants a year in slaughterhouses

    • Hugucinogens@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      11 hours ago

      Yeah but, I don’t think the people that have the power and make the decisions to do that, have any dinosaur plushies.

      • lookingforanALFpolycule@lemmy.world
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        9 hours ago

        You have the power. You make the choice to contribute to this multiple times a day.

        (You) as in the reader.

        • Pencilnoob@lemmy.world
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          8 hours ago

          Yeah and marry me “chicken” tofu on TheeBurgerGuy on YouTube is better than any real chicken. It’s like the best cooked chicken you’ll ever have. Perfect texture and flavor! No gross raw chicken juices to handle. Happy belly and happy soul

          • Corn@lemmy.ml
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            8 hours ago

            OK, but chickens are assholes who refuse to let me pet them.

            Every cow I’ve met has been affectionate towards even random strangers.

            • lookingforanALFpolycule@lemmy.world
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              5 hours ago

              Brb driving 90 in a school zone because I’m not allowed to pet the children

              • Corn@lemmy.ml
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                2 hours ago

                If the children are biting you when you attempt to pet them, skill issue.

              • Mora@pawb.social
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                4 hours ago

                That would certainly improve your eco footprint or something

            • Reginald_T_Biter@lemmy.world
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              3 hours ago

              Tell that to the cows near my house. Bloody bastards.

              Edit: in a very cute way.

            • Pencilnoob@lemmy.world
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              8 hours ago

              My neighbors both have chickens that love being picked up and petted. Depends on the breed.

              Also ocelots don’t like to be petted, do we need to build ocelot murder factories now to kill a few billion a year as revenge?

              • Corn@lemmy.ml
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                2 hours ago

                Well does ocelot taste good?

              • Psionicsickness@reddthat.com
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                8 hours ago

                Ocelots might not like to be petted, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still want to.

      • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@feddit.uk
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        9 hours ago

        What if they DID, that’d be some Blade-type tormented soul shit. Tyson CEO/chicken otherkin, he stalks the night hunting Chick-fil-A employees and praying to Devil Dinosaur for another asteroid to wipe out the apes - but he was bitten by a radioactive chicken CEO, and by day he is bound to the grey boardrooms of a meat conglomerate!

    • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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      10 hours ago

      We’d certainly need to kill a lot less than 90 billion if we had big ass dinos to farm.

    • kurt_vonnegut2@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10 hours ago

      In the most horrible circumstances.

  • BeerStainedBunny@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    11 hours ago

    I wouldn’t love T-Rexes if they were here I don’t think I can run fast enough

    • Skua@kbin.earth
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      5 hours ago

      I definitely can’t outrun a tiger but they’re still amazing and I would 100% pet one if I could do so without becoming lunch

    • Cora@lemmy.world
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      5 hours ago

      I read this as “T-rexas” and briefly imagined a T-Rex in a cowboy hat driving a lifted truck. 😂

    • NihilSineNefas@lemmy.world
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      10 hours ago

      Skill issue. T-rexs can’t run fast enough to escape my love for them

  • Tanis Nikana@lemmy.world
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    14 hours ago

    I have an endless pile of turtle plushies. :D

    🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

    • cannedtuna@lemmy.world
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      14 hours ago

      I hope when you lay down in your plushie pile that it’s just turtle all the way down.

  • mycodesucks@lemmy.world
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    11 hours ago

    … And that’s when the attack comes… Not from the front, but from the SIDES.

    By the other two plushies… You didn’t even know were there

    • jack_of_sandwich@lemmy.sdf.org
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      6 hours ago

      Clever girl

  • ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
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    12 hours ago

    I love you T-rex and would hug you without expecting a hug back. I know you’re trying.

  • DonkeyStar@lemmy.world
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    15 hours ago

    Watching an episode of The X-Files about a zoo earlier today. “Aww, the elephant wants to be friends with the truck! Aww, the puma wants to be frie- I’d be very dead if I were allowed to interact with dangerous animals.”

    • crenquis@lemmy.today
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      14 hours ago

      I always tell the wife that if they ever find my body mauled by a mountain lion, she’ll know my last words were “who’s a pretty kitty?”

      • rain_enjoyer@sopuli.xyz
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        11 hours ago

        pumas meow, that’s how they would lure you

  • crenquis@lemmy.today
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    14 hours ago

    I have at least a couple dino plushies.

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