Objectification, hate, rape threats: the politicians debating online abuse mean well, but to truly understand, they need to see what I see
Fuck Reddit and Fuck Spez.
Interesting article and I think it really highlights how toxic some parts of the Internet are. My only issue is the conclusion,
A social media ban for under-16s might prevent young boys seeing endless content that treats women with contempt and hate. Boys at this age are very susceptible to the cool and funny framing of what is, in reality, relentless misogyny. A ban might not fix the problem, but it would help. If society can’t stop it, it can show it disapproves.
Emphasis mine. Having grown up in a different era I can confirm that boys of a wide variety of ages, including much older “boys”, can also be scumbags. Even if we had the perfect technology to ban under-16s from social media, once they hit 16 they’d still be exposed to it, still become terrible people, and the author of this article, although a but older, would still see it. I don’t know if that really is a better world, just a slightly delayed one.
I don’t know the solution, but I remember reading once that some online game would put all the reported and abusive players into a special category where they would be forced to play only with each other. Maybe we can do that in this case.
I kind of feel like social media already does put toxic people together and that has lead them to compete on how toxic they can be. I don’t think forcing gross people into communities with a bunch of people who think the same way helps at all. Being seperated from that and seeing more perspectives seems better.
You’re right that putting people in bubbles is probably one way some of these things get worse. If all you see is toxic, toxic is the norm, now you’re always toxic.
Maybe they can tricked.
Although really what we’re talking about is the algorithm that currently exists being focused on highlighting terrible people doing terrible things. Can we turn that same algorithm around and use it for good?
Personally I think we should get rid of the algorithms all together and go back to timeline with only people you follow, but I also just looked outside and there are no flying pigs.
I am not sure if the algorithm is particularly evil or just uncaring and optimizing for engagement. An algorithm that specifically tried to keep you out of bubbles would be interesting, but there is the question if people would enjoy using it enough for it to do any good or for companies to want to use it without being forced to.
I try to do my best to stay away from algorithms lately. I think being more intentional about it helps me, but perhaps that doesn’t work for some people. I think we need to figure something out though because the effects are obviously pretty bad.
I have a small tight group of guys and gals I occasionally play online games with and I seldom play games where I’m matched up with strangers. It’s not worth it.
As soon as they hear you are a chick… Most usually start with the low hanging fruit “You fat and ugly”
Although one time some guy kept saying I was probably old. Like 40. With 2 kids. I thought that was slightly more creative. But still basic.
I am 40 actually. But I don’t have kids and told him No crotch goblins for me. They might end up like him.
Then told him I could tell he was nervous cause his voice was shakey. Asked him if this was his first time talking to a female.
Then I blocked him and left the game so he couldnt do any come back.
It’s really sad how prevalent it is.
I think it depends a lot on the games, communities, and moderation, though.
In my games, at least, I wouldn’t say I see much toxicity, even when it can feel different because of its impact. When I do see toxicity, I consistently report and block.
In all my years, I think I can count misogyny in my games (towards others I overhear) on one hand. Which, of course, doesn’t invalidate those who have different experiences. Many women choose not to talk at all because of these issues, which makes it less likely for other people to experience and see such occurrences.
I find more recent developments interesting where people can change their voice to male and female, which allows people to talk with their voice, but not be identifiable as one or the other. Hopefully it can enable people and make them more comfortable.
Ive also encountered misogynist comments directed at male friends who play games with me.
On a few occasions I’ve had my best guy pal I play with be bombarded with comments about how he’s a simp if he helps me in any way in the game.
I told this guy friend I was mad for him. He said he just ignores it but. It’s pretty shitty.
Being cooperative doesn’t make him a simp. We like playing games together cause we have a fun dynamic. I kinda hated that other men were trying to make him feel bad about it.
Mysoginist men really try to enforce other men to bend to their rules just as much as they harass women.
I feel bad for my indian nieces, they get the worst of all worlds on the internet, think they stick to roblox tho no social media for them
roblox tho no social media for them
Oh boy… in sorry to be the one to point this out. Roblox is a problem.
https://www.theguardian.com/games/2026/feb/20/los-angeles-sues-roblox-la-county
Ik but they do dress to impress type kid sht, not really chatting and not that much videogame type screen time, they more watch youtube/tv, groomings everywhere, at least they arent actively facing racism for their appearence/culture since thats not exposed
“Bop” stands for “been over passed”
No, it’s not. It means “a good song”.
Nothing on UrbanDictionary, nothing on even Google. What is this nonsense?
Sexual equality has ceased to exist online.
It never existed in the first place, so there’s that.
Anyway, yeah, internet bad. Time to ban all sub-16 children from Social Media. It’s been long overdue.
the politicians debating online abuse mean well
Let me stop you there
The politicians debating online abuse claim to mean well.
I’d give her a pass for being 15
NEVER use social media that requires your personal information. Try not to use it at all.
This is a voluntary social disease. It’s not necessary.
My teachers taught me to never ever give my personal data away to strangers for my own safety. Now politicians want to force everyone to do just that. For safety reasons…
The problem is if everyone uses it then it creates great pressure for others to also use it. I try to avoid it as best I can and prefer to only use platform where I can post under a variety of names without hard links to my real identity.
You cannot ask a 15 year old for that. They are subject to peer pressure. The only way is to forbid or restrict the access to Social Media to minors. The real question is: who must do it?
Forbid this, forbid that… How about actual fucking parenting instead? As a “zoomer” who used to use antisocial media back when I was 15 but didn’t end up encountering all this objectification crap 'til much later on in life despite being having better computer skills than my parents, let me testify that having hobbies helps. And most of my hobbies developed with considerable help from my parents whom I was able to ask for help/advice.
I empathize but what does she want? People are assholes. They’re assholes on social media and they’re assholes everywhere else.
Well, uh… I think she wants people to get better. Like all of us.
Platforms could moderate their content. They choose not to.
If only we could hold social media’s billionaires accountable or something. Unfortunately, that is impossible, and we can and should never imagine a better world.
(It’s kind of interesting that in a thread about Flock surveillance, people are talking about destroying the nodes. While in a thread about a girl getting abused online, there’s a whole lot more defeatism all around.)
There’s a little thing called “free speech”. Govt doesn’t have the power to regulate speech.
E: Never though I’d live in a world where people were falling over themselves to regulate speech. What a sick sad world it is. Can you just for a millisecond imagine what that looks like when the shoe is on the other foot? What do you think fascists would do with that sort of power?
Sorry what? Tech billionaires don’t have to enable the free speech of sexually harassing a child online.
And if your argument is that sexually harassing a child online is “free speech” - and that’s the best argument you have - that’s not a good argument.
My argument is that it’s illegal for the govt to regulate such speech.
What kind of accountability were you referring to? Were you expecting tech billionaires to hold themselves accountable?
Go yell “fire” in a crowded theater, or “i have a bomb” on an airplane and see just how quickly the government regulates your speech.
Common misconception. That’s not illegal. Nor is it what’s happening.
The article is from a UK newspaper. What is and isn’t legal for them to regulate is decided by their Parliament and nobody else. No Kings, and all that.
Meanwhile, you should know that the “free speech” lectures are getting pretty old from the country that checks social media history at the border to make sure you didn’t say anything bad about the Dear Leader, which shuts down TV shows it doesn’t like, and generally ensures the media toes the party line.
(See also - lectures on why kids shooting up schools is a necessary price to pay for that well regulated militia that will be along to save you from tyrants, well, real soon now…)
from the country that checks social media history at the border to make sure you didn’t say anything bad about the Dear Leader
That’s also illegal. A rational person would argue to prevent that. An irrational person would suggest that it justifies the regulation of even more speech by an already fascist govt.
Genuinely asking here: do you think the word “illegal” means wrong?
By definition, if a sovereign government decides it’s allowed to do something, it’s not illegal. You could say it’s unethical (though I’m not sure why you would), but you can’t say it’s illegal.
She doesn’t know the half of it. She’s a good kid
the politicians debating online abuse mean well
Hard disagree.
This young woman is an exceptional writer. Not many her age can achieve such coherency and well laid structure in longer essays.
I hope she will continue using her skills and keep fighting against this new rise of misogyny.
In no way discounting her experience, but it’s almost like she’s a woman and not a man and she sees things from the woman’s perspective.
It’s a cruel reality, and without having to do a battle of the sexes comparison, everybody gets this bullshit, regardless of gender identity or sex.
Ever been a man and walked into a woman’s online space and see the bullshit that goes on there, the horrible accusations, derogatory dialogue? Ever been falsely accused of sexual impropriety by a woman who’s just looking to hold power?
People are assholes, and when you go on a platform filled with assholes, they’re going to be assholes. Solution, stop going to those places and live in the real world.
15 would make her a girl, not a woman
it’s almost like she’s a woman and not a man and she sees things from the woman’s perspective.
yeah right, how dare she!!! the audacity of females these days, talking about their problems. unbelievable!!!
you’re no better than the shitheads this article is about. fuck you and your “both sides” nonsense.
Fuck you, for calling her a female, you sexist piece of shit!
Ever been a man and walked into a woman’s online space
Yes, and it’s miles better than most men’s online spaces
Got anything to back that up, other than “that’s how I feel about it” or nah?
inner thoughts
I know you likely don’t, but maybe you’ll surprise me.
I might be wrong but it just seems like you stopped short of saying “not all men”. Did you forget that bit?
I would encourage you to read what is said and try to understand it, versus taking this tired, feeble, accusatory approach.
Solution, stop going to those places and live in the real world.
Agreed with you until this point. You realize the people online are the same people from real life, right?
That’s not how it works, perhaps you might want to close your apps for a few weeks and live in the real world and then you will realize it is nothing like the online spaces.
that’s right! she can simply turn off her phone, and go to school where the boys oh no they’re the same boys aren’t they. oh well, good things school aren’t known for harassment, bullying, and girls not being taken seriously by staff!
